Depression

Awareness, Awe, and Your Wild Rainforest Mind

/ dontstandsoclosetome / Leave a comment

I stumbled across this blog on one of my adventures down the ‘rabbit hole’ that is the Internet.

I was stunned.

Are there really other people like me? Could all the traits and thoughts that have fueled my depression actually be gifts? Gifts that people, early in my life, had trampled on and tried to beat down? People afraid of my difference? Is being so different and so misunderstood what caused me to feel so WRONG almost my entire life?

The answer has to be “YES!”.

Now I can only hope that I have the time and the fortitude to forge a new path. To honour my true self and feel the energy and love that comes with being who I really am.

“And what we will all be seeking when we decamp, and for the rest of our lives, will be large, stable communities of like-minded people…”

― Kurt Vonnegut, Palm Sunday: An Autobiographical Collage

Your Rainforest Mind

(This post was inspired by the writer, visionary, and extraordinarily rainforest-minded Geneen Marie Haugen*)

“…I grieve and wonder why so many of our human kin don’t seem to recognize the astonishing miracle of our mutual existence on this precious, exquisite, watery planet that we share not only with fantastically diverse cultures, but also with our companion communities of humpback whales, hummingbirds, giraffes. Is such experiential awareness and awe not available to all of us?…”Geneen Marie Haugen

(photo courtesy of Dev Asangbam, Unsplash)

Maybe not. Awareness and awe seem to exist at different levels and intensities for each of us. Our capacity for awareness and awe might be related to how curious, sensitive, intuitive, empathetic, and perceptive we are.

When you have a rainforest mind, though, you are guaranteed to be living with high levels of both.

Let me explain.

~ Awareness ~

There are many things you…

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Crippling Procrastination or Prophetic Genius?

/ dontstandsoclosetome / Leave a comment

In 2016, when I chose the name for this site, I had never heard the term ‘Social Distancing’.

I was a severely depressed and traumatized soul working my way out of the pit of despair that was my life. A bit dramatic? maybe. maybe not.

I was learning that the only way I might hope to recover was to stop pretending to be a person I clearly wasn’t, and figure out what kind of person I am. And then stop apologizing for it.

I was coming to terms with the fact that I was not ‘shy’, but introverted… and that introversion is NOT a social disease (more on this in future posts).

Hoping that through the public analysis and documentation of my attempt to rebuild my totally obliterated sense of self, someone else might see themselves in my ramblings and experience a moment or two of comfort.

Also I like to write. Not saying I’m good at it… just like to write. If you’re looking for perfect grammar and highbrow literary musings you are definitely in the wrong place.

And if an introvert sharing my deepest darkest thoughts in public seems counterintuitive to you, remember I am not shy. I just don’t want anyone standing too close to me.

I can truly say I was Social Distancing before Social Distancing was cool. <insert eye-roll here>